Words to Live By

This started out as an exploration of “Things Learned Since College.”  It’s been 4 years now since I moved to Los Angeles after graduating, and I haven’t done a lot of reflection on what I’ve learned in that time, which is a lot.  But then this post started morphing into more of “life-lessons,” some of which I learned in high school or college.  Really I just wanted to put these important things on paper (or the interwebs) as a bit of a mantra or anthem of things I’ve learned in life.  Some are deep, and some are just silly realizations about me.  Anyway, I hope you enjoy…or are inspired/amused in some way. 

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I have always been a nerd and a wallflower but I was too self-conscious to embrace it before.  Now I go to Comic-Con, or listen to Bon Iver, and feel at home.

I really, really love dogs.

“You can’t always get what you want, but if you try sometimes, well you just might find, you get what you need.” –Rolling Stones

Fight for good friendships but be OK with letting unhealthy ones go. (a.k.a. “Know when to hold ‘em, know when to fold ‘em” –Kenny Rogers)

Indie music is God's gift to the artistic and introspective.

On that note, it’s OK to be an introvert.

What do you want to do or be in life? Just do it! Don't worry.

Emotions can be lying, cheating bitches.  Don’t rely solely on them.

Let your kids go to parties. Knowing how to navigate these social situations becomes just as important as grades.

Take a risk in opening yourself up for love.

Realize you are the villain of your own story and that God still doesn't give up on you. We can always change.

I love Jesus just as much as I did when I was in high school, but sometimes I understand him less.

We really, really need community.

If you are in a position of privilege, consider if your outlook on the world is shaped by that fact, and try to walk in someone else's shoes. You might realize Anacostia, DC or South LA is beautiful.

Goals and restraint/discipline are important.

Taking care of another living thing daily teaches you mounds of responsibility.

Sci-fi is effing cool.

Do not be afraid.

Country, barefoot, rain, and a hoodie. Perfect combination.

Change in relationships is inevitable. Don't close yourself off or put up walls. Enjoy the moments when you have them.

“It's a beautiful day, don't let it fade away.” – U2

"You think you know what you're looking for, till what you're looking for finds you." – “When The Right One Comes Along” as heard on Nashville, written by Justin Davis, Georgia Middleman & Sarah Zimmerman

Courage is definitely not the absence of fear but rather embracing the fear and doing it anyway.

Art can be therapeutic.

"It's all talk talk talk/ Talkin’ in the wind/ It only slows you down if you start listenin’/ And it’s a whole lot harder to shine/ Than undermine." –“Undermine” as heard on Nashville, written by Trent Dabbs & Kacey Musgraves

Not being in control can actually be a really good thing.

I am an explorer of lands and places and skies.

"I am Rosemary's granddaughter/ The spitting image of my father/ And when the day is done/ My mama’s still my biggest fan/ Sometimes I’m clueless and I’m clumsy/ But I have friends that love me/ And they know where I stand/ It’s all a part of me/ That’s who I am"  –Jessica Andrews

Watch CRASH. Then talk about it with a group.

Go to an event of a culture not your own.

It's OK to have fun sometimes and celebrate this one wild and precious life. Just remember life isn't about you and your happiness.

Exercise is wonderful and doing it with others is better. There's something very satisfying about doing something you're bad at over and over again with passion until you ultimately grow in that skill.

You have to forgive. Forgive yourself, and forgive others. The most beautiful things will grow out of it.

Pursuing Health

Leave it to my sister to make me want to start writing again.  She is so inspirational.  Her blog, here, about her time in China is just great.  And she's an excellent writer.

I'm going to stop pretending that I write on here with any kind of frequency.  And that's OK.  I'd still like to have this as a growth goal to flex my writing muscles.  But one thing at a time.  I'm currently flexing my actual muscles on a journey to health via eating better and exercising better.

No, I'm not one of those fanatical Cross-Fit people... yet.  (Looking at you Casey and Gillian!)  But I have decided to start doing some basic things like, I don't know, moving around.  And not eating entire bowls of mac and cheese every few days.  A little thing called discipline goes a long way.

There's a few things that led to my change.  First, I just felt uncomfortable.  Though I didn't look it, I was technically obese, and was breaking my pants every few months.  Yes, it's awkward.  Giant holes in the middle of your pants are typically not fun.  And it made me want to change.  Then, over the holidays I learned some family history medical-type info that made me want to fight harder for health, too.

I also had a renewed sense of purpose in life that comes with re-evaluating and setting New Year's Resolutions.  Generally I think things like "YOLO" sound silly, but the idea that "You only live once" hit me.  I'd rather my life be full of health than full of sweets, cheese and beer.  (Even though I really, really love those things.)  Putting off healthy practices until tomorrow meant I was choosing death today.  

Plus, speaking of New Year's resolutions, who can't be inspired while listening to Sleeping at Last's "January White"?!  Some lyrics for your reading pleasure:

So let's press undo.
Rearrange the old and call it new-
January White.

Every calendar is playing the same old trick:
A year will disappear, replace with counterfeit
But we'll never really mind.

If nothing else, we're given a little time
To change the game, a chance to redefine
Everything we are,
January White.

...hope is January White.

Also fueling my recent quest to lose weight & be healthier is the fact that I'm actually pretty competitive.  Tell me to make a pact to go to the gym, and if I break it I have to pay?  Then I'm completing that pact every week, suckas!  (My mentality toward GymPact, which I love.)  Give me a calorie limit, and tell me I'll lose the weight if I hit it daily?  Then I'm suddenly watching what I eat so I can shed the pounds!  (Props to MyFitnessPal.)  Tell me my group at work can win...something...if we walk more than other groups?  Then I am all over my 6 am walks again, fo' realz! (Yay Time Warner FitNation and FitBit!)

So now that I've sufficiently plugged all the ways I'm working on my health, I want to point out my final catalyst for change.  I've still yet to read the book Love Does by Bob Goff.  But just the title and the premise - Love.  Does. - is inspiring!  Love acts and moves and makes plans and goals and goes after them!  All for the good of others.

In my Discipleship Workshop at church, we do these things called "circles," which sounds super cheesy and I laugh internally every time.  But the point is that there are two sides as you "work the circle."  The first is "What is God saying to me?"  and the second is "What am I going to do about it?"  Now I realize not all my friends and readers agree with my spirituality, but I've personally found so much joy and freedom in this question and response rhythm in life.

This rhythm all year of hearing a direction or issue to deal with, and then making a plan of action (with accountability) has gotten my lazy self back into a place where I can actually do some good.  In working toward this value we call "wholeness," the small disciplines in my life have actually given me more energy & passion to pursue even more changes.

I'm so thankful for Casey who has encouraged me to just pick one small thing to work on.  I've tried and failed all year to actually cook.  (I have unresolved issues with the kitchen - to be explained later.)  But deciding to NOT order Uptown Mac & Cheese at the AH-Mazing Granville Restaurant has been a small thing that pushes me on toward health.  I've started down this road with enough small successes that maybe, just maybe, I'll actually cook a meal this quarter.  I have momentum now!

So I hope that all 4 of you reading this have time to ponder this week, "What is God saying to me?" and then are able to make some small goals.  Because you may not climb Everest tomorrow, or save all the children in slavery.  But as you start moving, and doing, you may be surprised that those goals are no longer so far out of your reach!